A derailing event, usually before the age of seven, and the resulting false conclusions can subconsciously dominate a person's choices for a lifetime. The concept of 3|4|3 is simple. Three behaviours (perform, rebel or withdraw) that can be different in four lives (public, private, spiritual and sex). The behaviours are driven by three fuels (anger, fear or sadness). Most people develop a consistent behaviour in each of their lives, driven by a dominant emotion. Until they reverse the conclusion they are unlovable, the patterns control their lives.