From Alexander Holt comes a novel of revelation, hilarious sexual promiscuity and a representation of the depths that the mind will go in order to achieve peace at the end of its days. Ayden is a man atop the Los Angeles legal and literary food chain and a lost explorer of the open ocean. A once free-surfer born to the shorelines of Oregon and North Shore O'ahu, Ayden finds himself writing of his struggles in attempt to reconcile a past alternative lifestyle and his financial and sexual success as the top entertainment lawyer in LA. While Ayden spends his years drifting in and out of lucidity between the life he lives and the one he thinks he lives - he develops a mental photo album of memories that not even he can accurately decipher. Through four distinct phases of life, Ayden explores the constructs of his reality, and at the end of his days asks the question: do we really need to live the life we want? Or is thinking we have fulfilling enough.