To Whom it May Concern: Was it your fault that you weren't born in Russia? No, it wasn't. But are you sorry for it? No? You should be, because you missed the most entertaining life in the 20th century. And it isn't a tourist attraction which you may visit any time, like Great Pyramid of Giza. It's gone. You are blessed, because you don't have the slightest idea what you've missed There is no analogue to that unique society in human history. Was it my fault that I was born in Russia? No, it wasn't. But am I sorry for it? Of course not. Because the most entertaining life of the 20th century was a part of my life for almost 40 years. I must admit humbly that I didn't climb anything in the Himalayas and wasn't part of the crew which found the Titanic. I'd like to share with you the ordinary facts of my ordinary life, which when randomly presented to my American listeners created laughs, disbelief, and, in general, a good mood. But maybe it was my accent. Yes, you missed the train. But there are still some people who traveled on that train. I happen to be one of them. And I hope that my funny, sarcastic, politically incorrect, but sincere recollections of that 40 year long journey will pry the roof off and expose what it was like to be inside. It was a wild ride, but it got at least some of us passengers to the right station--the USA. I also hope that my memoir will make a valuable contribution to the general confusion regarding the state that no longer exists.