Twenty-six-year-old Benny lives in Queens. To date, he has done nothing in his life that would cause him to stand up and shout. Plain and simple-he is bored out of his gourd. But when he reads an advertisement that invites him to join the order of St. Sebastian, he feels that God is talking to him. Benny thinks he has found his calling. After he arrives at the monastery, Benny is shocked to discover only one resident monk. Albert, the monastery's Superior, is on the verge of closing the monastery. After he meets Benny, though, and realizes his intentions are pure, he decides to teach him the holy ropes. While Benny is coming to grips with the realization that entering the priesthood is not like joining the Elks or Boy Scouts, unsavory characters from his old neighborhood learn that the last surviving member of St. Sebastian will have the honor of disposing of the monastery. As Irish, Felix, Goldie, and Marko join the order with the hopes of cashing in on the sale, Benny prays he has the foresight to lead all the men in the right direction and do what it takes to keep the monastery open.