This comic Irish fiction novel describes strange goings-on in Ballyloo, where two dials on the village clock have any real significance: opening and closing time. On this momentous night, rather than the usual stampede to the pub, it's so quiet you can hear the temperature drop. Something is afoot but what? When Guard Gerry Berry is called upon to investigate, events soon conspire against him. As the night wears on, he is hampered by a man with a large gun, a damsel in distress and a remarkable inability to think straight. You think you got problems? Read on as our hapless hero entrusts his fate to a man who has a vested interest in seeing him dead and a star-struck witness who can hardly remember her own name...