Book One: Derek Montgomery Crawford IX Why do people do the things they do? Derek Crawford has spent most of his life searching for the answer to this question, as well as trying to cope with his childhood of abuse. With a genius IQ, a family closet full of skeletons, and a dark sense of cynical humor that borders on morbid, his quest takes an unexpected turn when he is pulled over for a routine traffic violation. As he battles overwhelming depression, Derek is determined that the two-hundred-year legacy of Crawford family violence will end with him--even if it means his own end. The problem is he can't quite get rid of his old man's voice, rattling in his head like a broken record a dozen years after death. With his faithful guard Roscoe the Dog by his side, Derek is busy hiding the family secrets, minding his own business, and disguising the network of tunnels beneath Crawford Hill in preparation for his final goodbye when Valerie Fleury knocks on the door of Crawford House and throws his plans--and his heart--askew. Will she be his next victim? His first? His last? Or can he dodge the genetic and social jokers he's been dealt and find peace and happiness? Should he bother trying? Or should he take the old man's advice, and teach her a lesson she'll die trying to forget? Sweet Ghetto Chickens last a long time in the cave. Join him and find out. Just be careful, because not all is as it seems on Crawford Hill. You might not come back. You might not want to.