My fellow Americans:
It is our pleasure, our honor, our duty as citizens to present to you "Duck for President." Here is a duck who began in a humble pond. Who worked his way to farmer. To governor. And now, perhaps, to the highest office in the land.
Some say, if he walks like a duck and talks like a duck, he is a duck.
We say, if he walks like a duck and talks like a duck, he will be the next president of the United States of America.
Thank you for your vote.