Michael Uxem is a grammar-obsessed, hearing-impaired evolutionary biologist who shares his home on Martha's Vineyard with three cats, an irascible parrot, and a tankful of red-bellied piranhas (his wife left him years ago for an Andersen Windows salesman). The goal of his scientific work is to discover a shark repellent that can be applied by beach-going humans as part of their sun cream (hence the piranhas, small-scale experimental substitutes for sharks). Just as his research is reaching a critical point, Mike's life is complicated when his senile uncle, Leroi Uxem, comes north from Tennessee and moves in with him. That's when pets and people start disappearing and everything gets out of hand.