The ultimate manual for those within or trying desperately to understand the government machine. Grudges, Rumours & Drama Queens used to be titled You Can't Polish A Turd, but the powers-that-be decided that Turd wasn't a proper government approved word. Those government auditors and policy wonks (at the highest levels I must add ) approved Grudges and Rumours as appropriate for a book about government and bureaucrats - and I thought they were a bunch of drama queens - hence the new title. At least, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. Grudges, Rumours & Drama Queens is essential reading for all aspiring and current government officers at all levels, as well as anybody who is desperate to understand how the whole machine works. Grudges Rumours & Drama Queens is an essential text for all aspiring and current bureaucrats, whether they realise it or not. This book builds on the work of the ancient philosophers Futilius and Dillayus, and details the importance of grudges, rumours, and unintelligible jargon. This manual will take you from the basics, such as how to not making decisions and passing the time on a quiet day, right up to advanced skills such as avoiding the blame. It will ensure your success as part of the government machine