The best way to describe this book is to describe what it is not. It is not a book to explain away a parents behavior. It is not a book to defend, excuse or rationalize. It is not a book about addiction or disease. It is not a book about coping or helping a child to understand. It is not a book about the secrets we keep. It is a book about what occurs in the world of a child when ambivalence is present. It is about how a child talks to him or herself, choosing behaviors and an identity to accommodate their environment. It is a book about how those behaviors are still running adult lives. It is about the message every child and adult needs to believe about being whole, perfect and complete.