When insecurities are not dealt with they can stifle personal development and any healthy start or progression of a relationship. Within If He Was Mine you will find "Dear Diary" excerpts of a woman who is trying to find the one man for her. She is going about it the wrong way because instead of trying to deal with her insecurities she wants a man who can fill all her voids. Day after day, week after week, she encounters various men and quickly falls for the ones who stop to entertain her desperateness. She distributes her phone number to gentlemen whose names she barely knows - Michael, no ... Sean. Wait, wait, wait, I know who it is. It's Charles. When a woman chooses not to deal with her insecurities, she will be willing to settle for anything, especially if her principal desire is attention from a man. She will settle for one night stands and for abuse. She will even settle for a man who cheats on her because at least he does attend to her needs, if only but for a moment. After each "Dear Diary" excerpt there is a "Question and Answer" section. Before you proceed to the next diary excerpt, you must take a moment to answer the questions. The most vital part of If He Was Mine is answering these questions. Each question is intended for you to manage, and possibly get rid of, your insecurities. Once you have completed the excerpts, questions and answers, it is then time for self development and growth. This may not be a book you want to pass around because each question should be answered honestly. If He Was Mine should be treated like your personal journal or diary, a place where you are able to be honest with yourself and write down your most inner thoughts. I hope that this "tool" helps you develop a better self-perception, that you are able to manage (or get rid of) your insecurities, and that you gain a better understanding of what a relationship should be by recognizing what it should not be.