"Jewish People Don't Sleep Outside" is a memoir written in the tradition of Erma Bombeck. The book chronicles the misadventures of five siblings growing up in Bayonne, New Jersey, with a Southern Baptist mother, who converted to Orthodox Judaism, and an incorrigible father who claimed to be the smartest man in the world. "Jewish People Don't Sleep Outside" was the second place winner at the Santa Barbara Writer's Conference in the biographical category and also placed in the top ten percent, out of thousands worldwide, in the Chesterfield Writer's Film Project. The day of my father's funeral my mother banged on his coffin yelling, "You'll never get away with this, Chubby Hammer " She blamed him for everything including her drinking, her gambling and her delicate health. From winning our hearts with chocolate malts, till the day he had the nerve to up and die on us, my father schemed and scammed his way through life.