Welcome to Key West, now don't get voted off the island Learn the methods to our madness. Mandy Miles' "Key West Dos and Don'ts" offers a quick and hilarious crash course on local life in a tourist town. Longtime Key West author and newspaper columnist Mandy Miles offers tropical tips and island etiquette on everything from parking and partying; to scooter horns and Hemingway. "In my nearly 20 years here, no one has ever asked me, 'Where do the tourists go?' But they all want to know how the locals live," said Miles. So here it is: 100 ways to conquer Key West and look like you live here - without getting voted off the island. Key West: Dont just visit; live it.