Volunteering for anything while serving in the Navy is risky business. Many a naive Sailor found himself suffering from "volunteers remorse" shortly after stepping forward to answer the call for a special assignment. Before he could hum the first few notes of Anchors Aweigh, he would come to believe that what he had asked for and what he had received may not be the same. He and others would doubt the wisdom of his decision. "It seemed like a good idea at the time" is one of several responses to the question, "just what were you thinking when you volunteered?" These questions were usually followed by the phrase, "you dumb S.O.B." "What have I got myself in to now" is a well known and often repeated question asked of self by volunteers everywhere. This question is usually followed up with a phrase such as, "you dumb S.O.B." This book chronicles events that evoked laughter along the author's route from a cushy job on shore duty to becoming a "Brown Water Sailor" on River Patrol Boats in the Mekong Delta of Vietnam. He found out that there was more to being on River Patrol Boats than the anticipated death and destruction, even on the, "Rivers of Death." The first several chapters outline the education and training the author and his classmates went through to prepare for service on River Patrol Boats. They were transformed from inexperienced Sailors to Sailors with basic skills in boat handling, weapons, and tactics. The remaining seven chapters are a narrative of his experiences while serving in River Division 533 where the real learning took place. There are no "war stories" or "tales of heroism" in this book. Others have already told the stories of the selfless acts performed by ordinary Sailors in the line of duty."