Ok... I'm a foster carer who doesn't want this placement. The department of Social Services know just how to apply pressure... Oh yes... they get one very good, very friendly, very experienced social worker that I happen to have so much respect for, to make the call, knowing, just knowing that I will possibly surrender and agree to share our home with a child that, to be honest, was the last child in the world that I felt capable of caring for... Felt capable of feeling anything for... Felt capable of... anything to do with her. Mmmm, sometimes I'm so bloody shallow you see. I don't want people to look at me as I go about my business. I don't want strangers giving me pitying looks or hurrying past pretending they haven't looked in my pram. I don't want to give up any of the precious time I spend with my birth children and husband. I want my life to stay just as it is. Happy and contented. Oh the lessons I was about to learn.