On the day he was celebrating the first day of his honeymoon, "Michael McCarthy" was erased - every aspect of self-identity, gone in an instant. This book is an autobiographical narrative describing in detail one man's journey through the mind-shattering loss of the person we take for granted we are. The subsequent search for "reality" leads through every available spiritual path, from religions to consciousness raising disciplines of every culture. The author's search for "The Holy Why?" leads through the darkest depths of human suffering. It is a journey through the inner realms to the awakening process of the Soul. A clearly delineated and often poetic description of the equally bizarre worlds of experiential spirituality, and quantum physics. All of it interwoven with recent scientific breakthroughs in brain chemistry research that eventually lead to a true spiritual awakening - a return to conscious living. It has been called ..".a lucid and comforting delineation of the things most people are still afraid to talk about." It is both entertaining and enlightening. A psychological and spiritual quest that goes far beyond simple belief. It fulfills the great promise of recent neuroscience research - both hemispheres of the brain get their "Ah, ha " moment. Heartbreaking, mind-blowing, and often funny, it is a clearly delineated journal of experiential spirituality What do you do when you have done everything "right," and the most absolutely "wrong" thing possible befalls you? Where can you go when you no longer have any concept of what "Right" or "Wrong" might actually be? What is it you should even seek in order to make sense of the senseless? In the nightmare of an idyllic life gone mad, where does one go? And how do we get there from here? An internationally honored spiritual visionary and artist, Nanette Crist, described her experience with the first chapters, thus: "I cried in his confusion and pain. And then laughed as he challenged - demanded - that God reveal Himself. And then, I saw God."