"A buffalo in the City don't get no pity..."
Perl and Hari start a fire and a French restaurant. They land up with a homicidal cook on the run from the French Police for the murder of a leading food critic, and a pair of waiters working towards a PhD in Chaos Theory. A gentlemanly buffalo called Jagan joins up as restaurant mascot, and is immediately converted into a four-legged bomb by the RATS terror group. But Perl has already embedded him with an experimental eViagra chip that sporadically turns him into a raging bovine Romeo, which makes him the quarry of Japanese super-spy Mata. Can Perl save Jagan from Mata and the RATS, and their cook from the French Police?
This is what leading book critics say about Exploding Buffalo:
Telangana Herald: We're inclined to think it's some kind of a book...
Farm & Ag Review: The author turns his attention from the herding of goats to the breeding of water buffalos, bringing the same scientific insights that he had brought to bear in the previous volume. A must-have for professional buffalo breeders.
Daily BJ: The word Sex is used six times, this time. An improvement, but this chap has far to go before we'll recommend his books.
Come on guys, critics will be critics. Read it and make up your own mind. Don't expect it to change your life - I mean, if you expect your life to change for $2.99, with discounts, what kind of life do you have, anyway? - But it'll help pass the long hours on a trans-Atlantic flight. A lot better than sampling the free alcohol and elbow wrestling your neighbor.
Extract:
"Well, young lady?" asked Perl. "Having another go at Jagan, I see."
"Yes, ma'am," said Mata, too exhausted to argue.
"Didn't I tell you his testicles were off-limits? You must fight this irrational urge for buffalo testicle curry. It is becoming a neurotic obsession with you."
"Not testicle, brain," mumbled Mata. "Bhutanese buffalo brain fry. Velly tasty."
"So You felt peckish for some brain fry, and you decided to de-brain poor Jagan? You can't just help yourself to his medulla oblongata because the spirit moves you I am sure he needs it."
"Moo " added Jagan He was attached to his cerebellum too.
"Yes. Keep your hands off his medulla oblongata, and his cerebellum and cranium as well, young lady. Do I have to ban you from his individual body parts?"
"No, ma'am."
"Next time you have an urge to taste prime rib steak, oxtail, trotters...whatever, remember, Jagan is not your one-point convenience store. We have Johnson Market for things like that."
"Johnson Market closed at 2 AM," said Mata
"Well, that's just too bad. Assuage your midnight hunger pangs with cheese and crackers. Stock your room with them. Desist from treating Jagan as your private larder."
"Yes ma'am."
"He is not a midnight snack."
"No ma'am."
"Moo " added Jagan.
"Or breakfast, for that matter."
"Yes ma'am."
"Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes ma'am."
"Very well, you may go now."