Brian is a dock employee who is too scared to talk to all the pretty girls who work at what others call The Philly Store. When a no-nonsense corporate efficiency expert shows up, the dock workers want Brian to hit on her to find out more information about MegaCorp's plans for the store. Brian is just as interested in Anya, a former mail-order bride who is getting a divorce, and Julia, a blonde, blue bombshell who barely knows he exists. In order to help save the store, Brian spies on the store manager who only hires pretty girls, the security guards who need someone to watch them, and the Russian ladies who only speak Russian. While Brian wants to believe in an America with opportunities for all, he is also cynical of the powers that be, including those that run The Philadelphia Store. Eventually, all of the guys and gals have to figure out what they're looking for in a job and in a significant other. While the the themes are plenty deep, the humor is generally very light, and the songs are fairly family-friendly. Joining Brian on the Dock are such characters as Danni (the former manager who just works nights), Amanda (the Malapropistic Mormon), Mike (the Lutheran), and Woody (the guy who never does any work). Can Brian figure out how to keep the store open, keep his job, defeat capitalism, and get a girl? The full music is not yet written for this musical. If you are interested in performing this play, please purchase the appropriate number of copies for your cast. If you are interested in working with the author in order to record the songs, use passiveninja.com as a contact site. Please contact for performance rights. Brian Jaeger is not a director or actor or musician, but he wrote one of the best musical plays you will ever read. Why? He's a writer who can find the funny. He's a former department store employee who knows the subject matter. He's even horribly bad at picking up ladies, which means he's good at writing about it. Or bad. Whatever, it's realistic, yet fantastic. You'll hear the rhythms of the yet-to-be recorded songs. You'll hear the voices of the yet-to-be acted out characters. You'll join the dock crew.