Dusty Springfield's voice rises from the grave. A Japanese swimming pool attendant waits patiently at the gates of heaven. And the green picnic blanket on the back seat of Carlo's car just moved... Bang bang. Slash slash. Crunch crunch. A collection of retro short stories + fantastical observations from a true crime writer. Playful, unpredictable and occasionally pretty violent. This book contains 16 sizzling short stories, 7 even shorter poems + 3 surreal pieces of average shortness all tenuously linked by a running commentary touching on Ned Kelly's murderous side, chocolate shag pile carpet and the joys of pet goldfish. 'Wendy Lewis's writing is taut, arresting and provocative. I couldn't stop turning the pages.' - Timothy Daly, multi-award winning playwright 'Confessional, dark, quirky; these pieces offer a little something for everyone.' - Leigh Swinbourne, author of Shadow in the Forest