Exgovernor, Julian Crown was in bullshit withdrawal because he had sworn off bullshitting but forgot how not to bullshit. Bullshit withdrawal symptoms have an odd effect on the addicted. Rather than BS coming from him Julian is surrounded the strange characters that make his bullshitting seem like nursery rhymes. Needless to say he is depressed about it and leaves the governors mansion to live out his days as a pig farmer in his home town. But his wife, Estelle, the only normal person he knows, wants to dine in the White House Rose Garden. The local politicians want Julian out of their hair and push his candidacy in bizarre ways. The sleepy town of Yarrum's eccentric locals make him feel sane despite the splinters of his ego talking to him at the worst times. Julian unwittingly takes the scenic route to authenticity while his rival Smart Ash implements his plan to take over the world. Only a psychiatrist needing a vacation could write this novelish book. Have a sit and get to know Hattie Bull, the Crown's Jamaican House Keeper, Andy Messesschmidt, Julians bipolar right hand man, Hank McCafferty, Vietnam War vet with extraordinary skills, the short but loud Harry Maxim, newspaper editor who should be an X-man, Burt and Inez Buck who do it twenty times per day, plus many others who give Julian more to think about than the polls. Polishing the Crown is painfully funny, unpredictable and an entertaining read. Recommended for the fully insane.