You give your heart to Jesus when you become a Christian. The ways of the Lord don't change. If you are not well cleansed by God, You keep on encircling back to sin. Heb 6:4 "For it is impossible to restore again to repentance those who have once been enlightened. Who have tasted the heavenly gift and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit." 2nd Peter Ch. 2:19. Your condition is worse when you go back to sin. Heb. Ch. 10:26. For if we sin deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth. There no longer remains a sacrifice for sin. It is not God's plan that we go back to sin. When you are going through Christian growth, your flesh is carrying your cross as you follow Jesus Christ.