This is a story that has carried on through a lifetime. A story of love and pain, of joy and suffering, but yet incorporating a marriage with such strength that even this could not break that tie that binds: either with each other or as followers of Jesus Christ. My wonderful and very special husband comes from a family of more pain and suffering that would be hard for anyone to reconcile to. There is a genetic factor that comes through his Mother's line that has brought devastation to their family. In his family he had one brother, Jim, dead at age 22, gunshot wound to the chest, another brother, Don, had serious mental breakdowns that occurred over and over all his life from the burden he carried of living with his Mother's accusations. She blamed him for Jim's death. Don was there visiting just before Jim took his life. Don was the last one to see him. Don could not cope with that fact so he suffered through mental breakdowns, over and over and over. And it was another brother, my husband's twin, Royce, who sought the Lord so hard in his own mental struggle that he ended up leaving his own beautiful family at age 33. Death was from car exhaust asphyxiation. And the one I married, Rol, has had a lifetime of suffering with five bouts of depression. That is what this story is all about. Our beautiful life and the tragedy of mental illness How did I handle the short periods of time that Rol had to suffer through a genetic chemical imbalance? It was a time of trusting God to bring us through. And we did manage to get through it each time and lived to rejoice. It is not easy to bear the burden of ill health but somehow you do it. It makes you stronger when you know that God is your sustainer. During the whole time God is always with us. The Holy Spirit is always with us giving advice, direction, hope, and support and so much love from family and friends. We have a love so strong but yet going through all these times of depression every ten or fifteen years took a toll, temporarily. However, when it happens, each time it happens, you are never prepared to have the tremendous pain again and you fight it so in your mind because your dear sweet, romantic husband has again vanished from you