If you've ever heard a Jewish, Blond, Italian, Irish, Blond, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Australian, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of analyst jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Analyst Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The book of analyst jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one analyst joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many analyst jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do analysts wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An analyst and his wife were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning. The Analyst turned to his wife and said: "When I die, I want you to sell all my stuff." "Why would you want me to do that?," asked his wife. "I figure that you'll eventually remarry, and I don't want some asshole using my stuff," replied the analyst. The analyst's spouse said: "What makes you think I'd marry another asshole?" *** Did you hear about the analyst who wore two jackets when he painted his house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do analysts laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.