In this gripping and painful memoir, Leeland Shelly Nash recounts her first tour of duty as a UN military observer in Sierra Leone while the country transitions from a brutal civil war to the election of a new government. As if acclimating to the stresses of her first overseas deployment in a country that is still on the brink of implosion is not enough she must also contend with gender discrimination and covert actions by someone seeking her repatriation back to Canada for reasons beyond simple sexism. Having engaged in similar struggles throughout her military career, she refuses to back down. While forced to second guess the next actions of her comrades she strives to continue to do her job and make a difference to the people around her in the mission, and to find hope in the midst of her discouraging environment.