""There's a worldwide war on Christianity."" (Rand Paul) And every war needs a survival guide. The Religious Right consider the secular humanist world to be in war against Christianity. The battleground is the definition of ""hate speech"" vs. religious freedom. Long demonized by various Christian denominations, author Belle Zebub outlines an essential 12-step program for surviving the looming War on Christianity, from recognizing the evangelical agenda of indoctrination to acknowledging the Vatican's campaign to legitimize paedophilia as a new form of sexual prophecy. Using only truthful quotations from Christian leaders sans political correctness, sans sensitivity, sans respect comes a contemporary satirical travesty unrivalled anywhere in the oxymoronic discipline of ""Biblical Scholarship.""