"Tell our children about my Abortion? Never It's none of their business and it would only upset everyone" The problem is that siblings seem to know or strongly suspect one of your babies died of miscarriage, still birth or abortion. There are few real secrets in a family. There are pseudo-secrets and these are very damaging. If you want an honest trusting relationship with your children, you must discuss all your pregnancy losses with them, then help them deal with the harsh truth. You will find children are better able to deal with reality than fears sparked by their fantasy of what happened. The truth will make your children free, free to communicate, free to trust, free to be. It is not easy dealing with reality, it never is. This booklet was written to help patients and people we know, deal with an inevitable crisis. Generally speaking the sooner the better, but you need to consider many ramifications.