My Dying Mom and Kurt Cobain tell the story of when the world-famous musician came to visit our Mother in the months preceding her death, three years after he took his own life. She knew very little about his legend leading up to her death, not much more than he was from our hometown of Aberdeen, Washington. But her truth was this. She was dying of cancer. It became her mission to figure out who was coming to visit her. Who was this young man with blue eyes? She began to believe it might have been a boy she had helped eleven years ago. The one she was now remembering as, The Boy from the Porch.
They met in the summer of 1986 when he needed a place to stay. He recently spent a week in the Aberdeen City Jail and found himself disconnected from his mother and father. An agreement was made allowing him to sleep in the basement, but this was kept a secret. His visit was brief and insignificant, mostly remembered as just another nameless boy needing help, which is something Mom was known to do, looking out for others.


Mom was diagnosed with Cancer just after the new year in January 1997. It was not good. Terminal lung cancer that had metastasized. Faced with choosing chemo and radiation with all the side effects or seeking alternative medicine as a treatment option, she selected the latter. At the time, Mom and Dad did not share how bad it was with the family. Her body weakened, and she often found herself alone in her room. The month before dying, something or someone pushed her to get out of bed and drive to Seattle, meeting with two of my brothers, asking if either was aware of any interaction our family may have had with the famous music kid from our hometown. Never mentioning him by name, neither brother had any idea whom she was talking about, and oddly enough, neither brother spoke to the other about this until five years later. Hence this remained a mystery. More than a decade after her death, they firmly concluded the boy Mom was talking about was Kurt Cobain.


Mom is the driving force behind this memoir. This is the story of her life, the early years growing up, meeting Dad, getting married, starting a family, and her kids' antics. Kurt will play three roles in telling her story, beginning with Himself as the world has come to know of him, The Boy From the Porch, when he appears in the summer of 1986. and the Visitor, as Mom described his presence in 1997. This should help you follow the outline and flow as the author references Kurt Cobain at different points in time when telling this story.


Five years after Mom died and long after the summer of 1986, my brothers began to put it together, sharing a story that captivated me and everyone involved, bringing my family closer in the years after her passing. In a similar experience, as you read this story, for fans of Kurt, I expect it will bring back your memories of his life, music, death, and the impact all that shit had on you. And to the family and friends of Kurt? I hope it brings you closer, but I doubt you need my help. Now feels like the right time to tell you our story.